Whenever Sam goes away on a work trip, we always hug and kiss goodbye at least a dozen times.  It always crosses my mind that this could be the last time I would see him.  As I thought about him today on the drive to the doctor's, I realized again what a gift God has given me in Sam. 

As we have attended childbirth classes and gone to our hospital tour and met other dads-to-be as well as fathers of young babies, I've been able to see what a contrast Sam is to them.  A lot of these dads scoff, mock or make jokes about childbirth and labor.  The moms are intent on learning; they're concerned, they're making themselves ready for this grand new responsibility.  But a lot of these dads seem far-removed -- or at least, very much so backseat participants and observers with an attitude of, "This is her thing, not mine.  I'm just here to be support if necessary."  Sam is so different from them.  He is truly my partner in all this.  This is our thing.  Not only is he in the front seat, sometimes he is driving!  He is more eager to read up all the information we need to know about pregnancy and childbirth than I am.  He was the one to do the research to find the best OB and the best hospital for us to have our baby.  And he has told me not to worry about trying to find a pediatrician because he'll take care of doing the research.  And unlike other dads who dread and despise going shopping for baby things and getting things ready for the baby (i.e. we've heard other dads complaining about how difficult it is to put the crib together, etc), Sam's always more than happy to do these things.

And how he loves our little baby!  He's always talking to the little baby in my tummy and so excited when Baby moves.  It just doesn't get old for him (which I thought it would by now).  If I tell him the baby's moving, he'll stop what he's doing, come to my side and put his hand where the baby had moved, and he'll wait and wait until the baby moves again.  Every movement, every hiccup, every jab and roll is like a little miracle to us, and he has yet to treat it like it isn't.  He really loves our little baby!  There's no way to describe the depth of his love for this little life that neither of us has met.  There is so much eagerness, excitement and anticipation.  Witnessing his love for our little baby helps me understand - even just a glimpse - of 1John 3:1, "How great the love the Father has lavished on us that we should be called children of God!"  Such endearing love Sam has for our little one -- even before s/he has even done one good deed, smiled at us or done anything remotely "cute" -- a love that has been formed and forged and developed simply because this little one belongs to us.  God created him/her, and s/he is ours to take care of until He sees fit to take him/her home.  And we love this little one deeply, just because.  That's what God's unexplainable love for us is like, measure for measure.

What a gift that God has given Sam to me to be my partner in life.  There is no one more devoted, loving and wonderful as him.  How much I love him - words cannot describe.  Thank you, God, for this best gift that you have ever given me.  May I endeavor to give you sufficient praise for your lavish love toward me (in giving him to me) all the days of my life!

I saw this news clip about a couple who didn't kiss before their wedding day...

And I had to write to Foxnews:

Just saw the clip about the couple who never kissed before marriage and wanted to say that it's not as unusual as it seems.  There was a phenomenon of such promises among Christian young people after "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris hit the bookstores about a decade ago.  With the idea of not dating around just for the sake of dating but for the purpose of marriage in mind (from this book) also came the idea to stay pure til marriage and not kiss til then.  Though it wasn't as a result of hopping on this bandwagon, persay, my husband and I did not kiss each other while we were dating either.  It was hard --- but so worth it!  And no, we did not split up after 6 months.  We've been married for a few years now and have never regretted that decision.  Physical intimacy is something you can grow in together after you've made a commitment of mind, heart, and spirit.  There is great freedom for satisfying sex in marriage when you don't have the baggage of past garbage.

Thanks for reporting! 
Mary Ann

P.S.  a note for my xanga readers, just to clarify, this is not to say that I think that everyone needs to make such a commitment as well.  abstinence, yes.  but determining physical boundaries is something you can do for yourself with the Holy Spirit's leading. 

Today is Sam's birthday - and I am so grateful that he is alive!

As most of you know, God used this very Xanga to bring the two of us together.  It started with one email that was tipped off by the one major, uncompromisable passion we had in our lives:  missions.  One email led to two, two led to three... and it wasn't very long after that when I had this feeling that God was doing something.  I was cautious, of course, considering it was all email-correspondence, but somehow I just knew in my spirit that he was the one.  Friends were a bit skeptical too, but because it was a God-thing, it became a real-thing. 

These days, this is the song I love singing to him, a song that I plan to keep singing 50 years from now:



One of the earlier -- seemingly trivial confirmations -- I had about him came the second week of our correspondence.  It happened when Sam innocently told me rather emphatically that he loved Pho (Vietnamese food).  I was really shocked and surprised!  Little did he know that a few days prior to that during some unrelated musings, I had just come to a new and profound realization that my culture was significant to me.  I realized that I wanted someone who would love and appreciate Vietnamese food and culture.  And while that may seem a matter-of-course, it was something new for me; prior to that I hadn't cared about being Vietnamese.  The timing of his comment was impeccable.

And it turned out to be not so trivial after all.  Vietnamese culture has become such an integral part of our married life.  Little known fact -- Sam has been learning Vietnamese for the past few years.  He knows so many words and phrases that I now notice my dad translating conversations to Sam which he already understood!  It makes me smile.

Speaking of languages, before we were married, Sam spent a few years as a missionary overseas, learning an unreached-people-group language.  This language has a script so different from our own, and yet he's still able to make sense of it.  Little known fact -- Sam is currently working on a translation project for this group.  He's helping to get their Bible onto the world wide web so that all the people in that culture can access the Word of God in their own heart language.  (How cool is that?)

And whenever Sam is staying up late (like we did last night) to work on this project even though he has to wake up early the next morning for work, I am reminded that God really answered my prayers to give me a partner who is as convicted and passionate about the nations as He has made me.  And though our hearts grow faint from all the waiting we are doing, I know that when He says go, we will go -- and Sam will be racing me to the plane! 

This is our "theme song" (played at our wedding as we dedicated our lives to missions):

Sam has the greatest servant heart.  I find myself challenged every day by how much he so readily serves me in our day-to-day.  It comes so naturally for him.  Even for his birthday -- I had plans to take him up to Santa Ana this Saturday to treat him to some Cajun crawfish boil (his absolute favorite) -- but because our good friends are moving this Saturday, he wanted to go help them instead!  What a man I have married, huh? 

Every day we are married, I fall more and more in love with him.  I still get lost in his eyes...

I love and adore you, anh.  So proud to be your wife.  Happy birthday!