March 1, 2010

  • Relay Race

    I took a nap today and woke up feeling even more tired than when I went to sleep.  My body just aches with exhaustion, feels like a Salvador Dali clock sort of dripping, drooping, melting, wilting.  These last few months have felt like I've been running a relay with myself.  It feels like I'm running and running and passing the baton to myself.  And as long as I keep a steady pace, I actually don't feel the brunt of my exhaustion, but sometimes, it hits me hard and I am suddenly aware of what my body has been going through.  That was today and yesterday and the day before that.  When it happens, I'll fall into a deep sleep for a few hours and won't even hear the baby's crying (until it gets really loud).  And strangely, it's at these times that I find out that the more I sleep, the more I realize how much sleep I need.  Too bad the race is still going on, and I need to keep pushing forward.

    Tonight, as I was putting my baby down in her crib, I looked at her peaceful, sweet, little face and felt my heart soar.  She gives my heart wings.  I tell you, this race is so worth running.

Comments (3)

  • I love your honesty. Parenting (apparently) is exhausting but worth the sacrifice. 

  • Thanks for sharing the ups and downs of parenting and for keeping it real. Glad to know it's worth the sacrifice! =)

  • Yes, it's definitely worth it.  Parenting isn't always exhausting.  And once we get beyond the first few months, it should get a lot easier in terms of sleep.  But we love our little baby so much; it's definitely worth it even now -- times infinity. :)

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