October 13, 2008

• On the job training

  There are fewer things in life that make you fall face down in humility as quickly as parenting.  As many books as you might read, as many kids as you might’ve cared for previously, and even if you’ve had a child before, every child is different.  They have their different temperaments and personalities, they have their different physical ailments and needs and preferences, and they have their different rhythms. On Friday, I found out again, as I was faced with a brand new baby, that it was like I know nothing at all. 

  At almost two months old but born premature by a month, this little baby boy came with a gift from God.  The gift?  The beautiful realization that if I do not pray, I cannot parent.  There’s no better gift than understanding that I need God.

  It really only took an hour for me to realize that I was clueless of what to do with this new little baby.  He seemed to cry whenever he was awake.  In fact, he seemed downright miserable unless he was asleep.  Even in the midst of drinking his bottle, he was unhappy.  And I didn’t know how to soothe him.  On that first night, he did not sleep for any length of time that granted me rest.  Even so, it wasn’t until the next day that I started to pray.  Lord, help me understand him.  Help me know how to help this helpless little baby.  I started realizing that I had really taken for granted my ability to know and anticipate our previous baby’s needs.

  And last night was much better.  We swaddled him at bedtime (a la Dr. Harvey Karp) and he slept more soundly and for longer intervals.  He’s now comforted by my holding him (found good positions that work for us).  And he seemed pretty happy being awake in our arms for awhile tonight, watching the Chargers game with us.  He’s no longer miserable when he’s awake nor miserable when he’s drinking his bottle (which he likes warm, by the way).  I’m still sleep-deprived… but so happy that we have a happier baby, thanks to God.  Seriously, can’t parent without the best Parent of all.

  • 1:12 am
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