February 10, 2008
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What’s my heart containing?
I was reading 2 Corinthians earlier and came across, “Rather, we have renounced secret and shameful ways…” The Holy Spirit prompted me immediately about unforgiveness. Unforgiveness is a “secret and shameful” way because when I don’t forgive someone, when I hold things against someone, when I criticize them and grumble against them for their wrongs, it’s secretive (they don’t know about it) and it’s cruel and unkind, so it is shameful. Unforgiveness is a sin. The grumbling against them usually leads to a self-righteous, prideful attitude of thinking I am better than them (when in reality, I am not). It’s such a subtle sin but I think it has contributed to how distant I have felt from God.
If I continue to hold things against people, there is no room in my heart for loving others the way God loves. Holding grudges really does occupy space in my heart. There’s no room for generosity or kindness. I can’t be a container of God’s love if I’m already containing hurtful, offended feelings. And if I can’t contain God’s love, then there’s no way I can pour out His love.
Where God is so forgiving, how can I be unforgiving? So here’s to my renouncement of “unforgiveness” — my secret and shameful way.
Comments (1)
this is a very vivid post to me. you know the story of some of these instances in my own life… and you were part of God’s way of healing me, giving me the desire to commit hurts to His hands, and to seek His kind of love to pour into my friendships with people. to seek community where it had been associated with my feelings of hurt and loneliness in the past. it’s definitely a process of growth for me to this day – wanting God to search my heart, accepting the sin and consequences that he reveals, and asking him to grow my heart purer like his. i’ll have to tell you more about it if you wanna know.
keep these thoughts flowing. . . i want to hear how God answers the wrestlings in your heart too.