October 20, 2005

• Sneakyness

  
  

  When I was a kid, I was always sort of sneaky.  When I was intrigued by something, I’d have no qualms about secretly indulging or investigating the object of my intrigue.  I never got caught.

  
  

  This morning while I was praying, I remembered one of these sneaky times.  (Major guilt complex, I guess!)  haha.

  
  

  The day was Dec 25th, many, many years ago… The place was in my pink-mini-blinded bedroom in southern california.  The time… about the middle of the morning.

  
  

  Everyone was about the house doing something.  My sister was up to something in her room.  My dad was in and out of his office.  My mom also roaming from room to room in the house.  (There was no Joshua back then!) 

  
  

  I had my radio on, as I was wont to do in those days, and caught some intriguing words from a radio station.  They were talking about someone named Jesus.  My ears tuned in.  It wasn’t like I had never heard of Jesus before, but I had never heard all that information before then, and I drank it in.  Jesus, Jesus, the Son of God, born in a lowly manger to save a sinner like me.  It seemed to me to be the most magical and mysterious and fairy tale like story I had ever heard.  I wanted to know more!

  
  

  But I was very aware of my family floating about, so I turned my radio down, I changed the channel when I heard them draw near, and I shut my door… oooh, this was something incredible.  But how they’d make a mockery of me if they knew I was listening to this “nonsense”! 

  
  

  It was the first of many times where I’d sneak in some info about Jesus.  There were those Sunday mornings when I had Billy Graham on my TV screen… and  when I’d hear the soft footfall on the stairs landing, I’d flip the channel to something else…  How intrigued I was!

  
  

  This morning I wept in complete gratefulness that those sneaky days are over… that I don’t just have stolen snatches and brief glimpses of this God of Love but that He’s given me the privilege to stand in full view of His glorious presence and that I’ve been able to drink deeply of His love.  I know Him.  I actually know Him!  No more sneakyness is needed.  (sigh) 

  • 7:33 pm
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