February 18, 2005

• women of the bible, part 2

  
  

  Gen 39 – Potiphar’s wife:  a woman I don’t wish to emulate.  v. 7, “and after a while his master’s wife took notice of Joseph…”  That’s where her problem began.  She noticed that Joseph was handsome and well-built one day – but she didn’t leave it at that.  I’m sure she kept her eye on him, was always aware of where he was and she began to see that not only was he good looking, but he was the one with the real power, not her husband, ’cause Joseph was in charge of everything in the household.  He had power, he was cute – and yes, he had charisma – or something, she couldn’t put her finger on it, but it meant that everything he touched seemed to prosper.  It made him totally “hot” and totally appealing.  Pretty soon, she began to think about him a LOT; she began to wonder what it’d be like to be with him… daydreaming, fantasizing until at last, she couldn’t stand it anymore, she had to have him… and so she basically threw herself at him.

  
  

  Now, I probably would never go so far as actually say, “Come to bed with me,” but I can see how there are things that I could end up doing and saying that would be pretty close to that.  And throwing myself at a man is as unladylike as it gets.

  
  

  Where does it start.  I think it starts with scoping out guys.  I remember in my nonChristian days how I’d always be looking anytime a guy would walk into a room. I would look up and sorta check him out.  Is he cute?  When I became a Christian, the question was more, “Is he a possibility?” (because guys are supposed to pursue, right?  and even though I had begun to believe this, it was still my deepest desire to have someone, and it was a hard habit to get over).  This is not good because then I’m just living by my flesh still. I am not honoring my brothers, and my mind is not on Christ.  My mind is on my flesh.

  
  

  “Scoping” leads inevitably to daydreaming – and this is when it gets really bad.  In the world of daydreams, you begin to make up an alternate universe where you’d imagine what it’d be like to date the person (but only through rose-colored glasses) – of course, there’d be flowers, candlelit dinners and handholding, and everything would be perfect – he’d always hold the door for you… and boy, you’d sure love to have this! — to have him!!

  
  

  What happens next?  Subtle manipluation which when it doesn’t work turns into aggressive flirtation.  You begin to say things that might trap him into hanging out with you or trap him into giving you compliments.  And you say things that make it so obvious that you’re infatuated with him.  And he feels trapped and cornered.  And he runs!  It’s really embarassing for everyone involved… and it doesn’t work!  You’ve lost him.

  
  

  Ok, that’s the worse case scenario… but I’m sure I’ve done it and I’m sure I’ve seen other girls do it…  It’s really quite pathetic to watch.

  
  

  But this morning as I was praying about this, I realized that I’ve gotten past this.  How have I?  By being captivated by something so much more powerfully and disarmingly wonderful than this flimsy ideal of romance that the media puts out:  God, Himself, the greatest Lover of my soul. 

  • 3:07 pm
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